Chasing Rainbows and Finding Quiet: The Power of the Evening Bookend
In a world that refuses to slow down, we often miss the 'small things'—the way the light hits a double rainbow or the simple warmth of a ceramic mug. I’ve started practicing a new ritual I call 'The Bookend.' It’s a quiet 10-minute window with a cup of coffee that acts as a buffer between the noise of the world and the quiet of my home. It’s where I process the day, file away the stress, and hold onto the moments that actually mattered. Most days it feels like my mind is going a thousand miles a minute with no stopping. Too many things to do, too many things to worry about, just too much. I need a pause, to reflect, to turn off the thoughts in my head, to regroup, just to relax and wind down at the end of the day. One day I was drinking my coffee during one of these quiet moments and I realized why the Japanese find the traditional tea ceremony so important; because it is that moment when we stop and we reflect. The tea cermeony is choreographed to be intentional, to focus on the ritual and that moment. The ceremony was historically used by warriors and leaders to find stillness in chaotic times. The tea ceremony is the traditional answer to that modern problem; it’s a structured way to force the brain to stop "doing" and start "being." The Japanese have a term for this: 'Ichigo Ichie', which means 'one time, one meeting.' It’s the reminder that this exact moment—this specific light, this specific cup of coffee, this specific feeling—will never happen again. Just like that double rainbow, it is fleeting, and that is what makes it worth stopping for. I do this with my cup of coffee. Even in the evening, a cup of decaf coffee and a quiet moment make me stop, enjoy the scent of the coffee, the feel of the cup, the quiet of the moment. I turn off the brain and enjoy the silence and the calm. Too often in today's world we go to bed stressed, we wake up stressed, our day is stressed. This creates anger, anxiety, tiredness, and other health issues. We need to slow down and appreiciate the small things. Other cultures have similiar practices with the same intention and purpose; try one or all.
Reset Rituals to Bridge Your Day
Just spending 10 minutes before bed has made a difference to my sleeping and how I feel in the morning. 10 minutes can be somedays hard to find buyt I bet if you start it will get easier to find everyday your bookend. First find a spot, any spot where you are comfortable. Next, no phone, no tv, no tablet; just quiet. This is your time; your time to bookend your day and bridge the begining to the end and relax from the stress in between. Shift your mind from the day to relaxing by activating a sense, touch, smell, taste, even temperature by holding the warm mug closely in your hand or resing your bare feet on the cold floor, let it ground you. Breath, take 3 intentional deep breaths, holding and exhailing. Exhale the tension of the day and setting aside all the "to-do's" on the list. 10 minutes just for you; if ancient warriors could find ten minutes for a tea bowl in the middle of chaos, surely we can find ten minutes for ourselves. Follow the guide below to get started on your journey.
1. The Setup (Minutes 0-2)
Find your "spot"—a consistent chair or corner of the room. Prepare your drink (I recommend a warm decaf) and turn off all screens. This is your nijiriguchi, the "small door" that signals you are leaving the world's status and stress behind.
2. The Sensory Anchor (Minutes 2-5)
Hold the cup. Feel the warmth through the ceramic and breathe in the aroma. If you feel particularly scattered, try the "Barefoot Reset"—place your feet on a cool floor while holding your warm drink. This physical contrast grounds your nervous system instantly.
3. The "Ichigo Ichie" Reflection (Minutes 5-8)
In the spirit of the Japanese
What was one "small thing" I noticed today? (A rainbow, a kind word, a quiet moment).
What am I officially "filing away" until tomorrow?
4. The Release (Minutes 8-10)
Take three intentional breaths. As you exhale, imagine the day's "to-do" list dissolving. You have finished your bridge; you are now home.
We spend so much of our lives 'doing' that we forget how to just 'be.' I hope you find your own version of a double rainbow today. If this post resonated with you, feel free to share it with a friend who might need a reminder to slow down. Until next time, keep looking for the small things. If you try it, come back and let me know how it felt. You might be surprised at how much lighter the day feels when you finally give it a place to rest.
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